Jan 24 2011

Do you perceive yourself as being less approachable?

Published by at 9:25 pm under Open Chat Night,Social Avenues

The opening topic for Open Chat Night will be a discussion about why some of us are less approachable among people at work, school and other social settings.

Whenever I am in a social environment, people seem cautious about approaching me and starting a conversation, other than the so-called small talk.  That mostly happens with people I don’t know very well.  For instance, I attended one of the Meetup.com events for dinner at a restaurant.  There were newcomers in the group including me and we didn’t know each other. During the entire conversation, I found myself trying to jump in but the others didn’t engage in further conversation with me as they did with each other.  It was very frustrating and put forth another negative feeling that nobody likes me.

I think the problem is my lack of self confidence and inability to let go of the past that makes people less likely to approach me.  Also, I am very inexperienced in social settings.  I believe I put off a nervous and unsure energy that makes some people feel uneasy to start a conversation.

I’ve had many bad experiences while growing up.  Broken friendships, being treated like an outsider, and the constant feeling of loneliness.  All of those have played a factor in who I am now, and makes it a greater challenge for me to overcome my social anxiety.

I can’t change my personality but I really need to work on improving my self confidence and leaving the past where it belongs. 

I know there are people out there who feel lonely and singled out in group conversations.  Please join us and share your story during Wednesday Night’s Open Chat Night.  As I’ve said many times, “Just remember, you are not alone.”

You can also leave a comment here or discuss the Do you perceive yourself as being less approachable? in the forum.

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